Anxious partners always have a fear that other will leave them so they hold tightly but do you know one secret. They are the one who push their partner away if he will come closer, in the fear of intimacy. If anybody comes after them they simply go away. They run only after who are running from them. They are chasers. Morever, for everything they blame themselves.
Avoidant partners always feel that if they will get very close to anybody then they might loose their independence and they can’t do so much what is expected from them so they run away. Morever, when they leave then it satisfies their ego also. For everything they blame the other.
Now the secret is avoidants are the one who push their partner away in the fear of Abondonment. They have secret fear of being left out. They are runners.
Above all this, these two attachment patterns you will find maximum together. Most of the marriages are of this combination which turn into pain later. Runners and chasers.
Both these patterns self sabotage themselves from love always in their life. They want love but push it away themselves and accept pain in their life and think it is because of the other.
Awareness is the first step towards happiness but this is not enough. They both need counselling as the roots are in their early years.
Hope this helps.
